logophilia

It came early this year
Urgency ordinarily ordered away
Insistent, irrepressible, irreducible, indisputable
Heavy as stone

(Rain, rain, wash everything clean
Help to wipe out these places we've been
Slick, wet, and shiny- each surface pristine
Clear away the aftermath, absolve us these sins)

We sang out for lapis lazuli skies
Childishly chirrupy, sprightly and spirited
Unexpecting, unsuspecting, turned dejected left bereft
"Sun", lied the forecast

(Rain, rain, wash everything clean
We don't want to remember these places we've been
Whisk away the dirt that's marred us obscene
Birth a new day to help thicken our skin)

Still

Back East the leaves turn and fall
I am still alone
Two years left behind a good man and my home
I am still alone
Pages get torn up and smells washed away
I am still alone
Optimism breeds contempt because
I am still alone
Playing the role women are meant for
but I am still alone
Changing and pushing and trying myself
I am still alone
Sleepwalking with a dream man surreal
and now I'm left alone
Begging time for its slow sweet heal
every time I feel alone
The leaves turned this way round this time last year
I'd just been left alone
I learned to forget, I slept and I met
and then found myself alone
I miss the men I've hugged and I've loved
all those plans which came to no fruition
I ache for the one man I still haven't met
I'm tired of being alone

But

there was so much we wanted to do...
I regret having ignored my gut feeling and taking on a responsibility I shouldn't have. One that threw way too much into the mix.
Mind-fuck of the century...